Same Song, Second Verse
  One day this week when I was scanning Facebook, I noticed on my page
where it showed me what my post was this same day last year. That should be fun right, to see what clever
thing I had to say, or exciting adventure I was up to, or deep spiritual truth
I was imparting? Not so much. On that day the previous year I wrote
something to the effect of "I am realizing I need to trust in the promise giver
and not the promise". While the post is
not embarrassing or something I regret saying, I was struck by a deep level of
disappointment because that is a statement I could post and it be true for me
even now, one year later. Was I STILL
there? Was I STILL struggling with the
same issues? I thought I was growing. I thought I was on a path to know better, do
better, be better. In one moment though
I felt like I had not grown or learned anything in the past 365 days. It reminded me of when I was a kid and we
would sing those silly songs with the refrain "same song, second (or third or
fourth, etc.) verse, a little bit louder, a little bit worse" and then proceed
to sing the song again and again, each time louder and crazier than the time
before. Although this was somewhat of a
rude awakening and caused momentary disappointment, I am glad it happened
because it was a reminder that I wish I was further along in that area, but I'm
not. Some lessons are learned quickly with
ease and some take time, sweat and tears.
I don't know why this is an area where I am still struggling, but now
that it's been brought to my attention again, I am going to do what I know to
do....take it to God and ask for His guidance and strength. I do honestly pray that when it comes to this
day next year, I will be able to say that I am not struggling with this
anymore. But if not, I won't give
up. I'll keep working on it until I
trust Him solely and I am everything God has made me to be. What are you struggling with that you were a year ago, and would like
to NOT be this time next year? Let's
make a plan of action, keep each other accountable and pray for one another as
we work on these things.
nancy sousa Date 9/18/2011 5:25:20 PM
I so identify with you on this Amy. I thought a year ago I would be so much further in straightening out complex relationships in my life - because I would trust God to lead me. One year later, I am still confused and not at all where I want to be. And I recognize that it is because I am trying to fix things (or not - as fear takes control), and not following Gods lead. But like you - I will not give up, but rather pray for grace and guidance to start anew. For I do know that God is the answer a
Amy G Date 9/19/2011 9:48:00 PM
thanks for sharing and being transparent nancy! good to know I am not the only one!
|
